How to get on a space trip? ● Heat waves will be called hurricanes ● And they scare us with atomic energy ● Poland and Germany do not know who is killing their fish

• How to get on a space trip? Applications for space tourism are growing, and NASA doesn’t know if it can handle it. That’s just in case you’re still worried that Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, or others like them are really putting together penny after penny, billion after billion, to get humanity to Mars out of pure scientific enthusiasm or great love for humanity. Please, maybe they will take you, but for fun, to the Martian mud baths, for a fee. For hard money. And it does not concern us. We also have mud in Amara. What do we need from that Martian who doesn’t even know if he’s healthy or if you’re still alive with some sick person over there? The fact is that since about 2001, since the Russians set the tone for space tourism, demand has grown exponentially. Private companies are also involved, we know that, but they also need people trained by NASA. Specialists are needed for flight control, as part of the shuttle crew. Well, they say, it would really be necessary to create a special department at NASA that would deal only with this. And in the American space agency, none of these issues were ever on the agenda. However, taking into account the profit, the chances of getting involved in this business are quite high. While one, the other, we also get a ride from this? Let’s not go alone, because we Romanians don’t have the money for that. But let’s at least make a plan. Let’s send a few of our own to set an example for humanity. And if we only collect money for takeout? The gesture matters. And no, we weren’t thinking about the national football team.

• Heat waves will be called hurricanes. After the temperatures reach the values ​​and 44.4 degrees Celsius across Spain, those guys thought it would be a good idea to call heat waves what they call hurricanes in the US. That is why the wave that hit Spain was called Zoya. Eeeee! How cute! Please, no one knows why they started with the letter Z in the first place, not exactly an inspired choice in the current context, but that’s their job. Even more interesting is that the Spanish authorities will alternate female and male names. How cool! But, again, we are not told by what criteria. In any case, what interests us is when we Romanians join the ranks of the world. I mean, we also have heat waves. We’re not the last to get burned, sorry for the uninspired expression in this heat. We propose to create a government commission, with benefits, special pensions, all the equipment to deal with this. After all, this is important work. Look, we have come with the first offers! For example, let the next heat wave be called the Vlad Chiriches wave. Well, don’t you just get hot when you see a man playing on the field? It’s an inspired name. Or the Veorica wave, if we have to choose a local, authentic Romanian name. Finally! We don’t know about you, but let’s face it, we’re already sweating.

• And they scare us with nuclear weapons. If you need more proof that a prestigious magazine naturally really profitable business, here’s a new one! Some researchers from Rutgers University in New Jersey, USA, claim that a nuclear conflict between the two countries would have catastrophic consequences at the global level. That’s right! How did they arrive at this truly revealing conclusion? I mean, what mechanisms did they spin there, what calculations did they make to come to such a conclusion? And we, simple people, thought that it would be happiness. The males who compete with us will disappear and we will be secluded on an island paradise, each with about 20 models of hats, so that they have someone to bring us a mug… a beer for old age and someone to cheer us on. us with a palm leaf when it gets hot. I pray that there will be no more heat, that a nuclear winter is possible, but it was not important. Importantly, in the event of such a catastrophe, global food production will be reduced by more than 90%, which means that approximately 5 million fellow planets will be told “Goodbye, muchachos!”. Well, that’s pretty much the conclusion of the study. Where they hit is clear as day. It is unclear, as I already said, how they came to such a conclusion, which, by the way, was known back in the 50s and 60s, when it was planned to create nuclear bombs?

• Poland and Germany do not know who is killing their fish. As you’ve probably seen in the media over the past few days, an environmental disaster has just hit Germany and Poland. More precisely, the Oder River was clogged with some kind of chemicals, and the banks were filled with fish with raised legs and hooked claws. There is a rumor that the fish has neither legs nor claws. more! What level of mercury was found in the river water, nothing is excluded. That’s why we say keep all options open. In general, neither the Ministry of the Environment of Poland nor Germany has any idea about what other substances were dumped into the Oder. And most importantly, who did it. Poland even offers a reward of 1 million zlotys (about 220 thousand dollars) for information about the criminal. Well, that’s another thing he doesn’t know. How the hell can you contaminate something so evil and not have any suspects? I have not been to Poland before, but who has been there can give us valuable tips, maybe we can get this reward together. I mean, does every citizen actually own industrial amounts of mercury there? We also asked, like the Romanian, impartially.