“I am a journalist, I am 33 years old, I have two little boys, and I felt that their birth stole my whole life. I’ve been in therapy, but I still miss my life before I became a father…”

In the cycle of articles about postpartum depression, we suggest you read the testimony of a father who has experienced postpartum depression. His states of anxiety, anger and hopelessness, frequent panic attacks that plunged him into depression, convinced him to seek help. At home, he could not talk about it, he did not even think that something like this could happen to him, but he decided to go to a psychotherapist. Here is his story:

“I knew something was wrong with me pretty quickly after my first boy was born. I had a perfect life – a wonderful wife whom I adored, the best job on earth that allowed me to do what I love and earn enough to enjoy life, an apartment in a good neighborhood. When my wife got pregnant, I was the happiest person on earth. I loved, I was loved, I was going to become a father. She told me that I didn’t know what she was feeling, that she was hurt, that she was done, that she was fed up. I felt the same way…

I knew my life would change after I became a father, but I had no idea how much. In the first weeks after giving birth, I felt too much. My wife, with whom you could talk about anything before, has moved away from me. He had problems with breastfeeding, he could not put the baby to the breast properly. The child cried, cried, every day, whether mother was with us or a friend. I started reading about it to help her. But my advice was never good. She kept telling me that I didn’t know what she was feeling, that she was in pain, that everything was over, that she had had enough. I felt the same way. I was hurt by her suffering, but I was afraid to tell her because I felt that whatever I said or did to her was not enough. Or that my advice is inappropriate. He told me many times. So I refused to give him advice…”

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