Anyone who has lived in an apartment building in Romania knows (or at least heard) about the madness of the HOA and the circus at the general meeting. I know them personally after I voluntarily took on the role of president in 2015 to be able to form an Owners Association in a new quarter near the Romanian government. It seemed to me (and still seems to be) a moral obligation and an act of normality for a citizen to participate in the community in which he lives, somehow to contribute to the common good and the accepted social contract.

After several years of stress and work free of charge I resigned, the Association worked for 20 months without a president because no one wanted to participate. I resumed my job when the bank threatened to close the account because the president’s duties include updating bank records and signing documents to prevent tax evasion. However, this time I returned to the “generous” salary of 400 RON/month.

Direct experience is fundamentally different from the stories we hear or the scenarios we imagine, and nothing can prepare you for the adventures the president may go through and which are manifestations of our character as Romanians. Dissatisfaction, disappointment, insults, pettiness find a favorable environment in owners’ societies to come to the surface. We will complain that the new door closes both too loudly and too slowly; that the water pressure in the hydrophore is too high, but still too low; that repairs should and should not be done; that why do you hear dogs on the street and why does water flow from top to bottom.

At the beginning of the journey, the president will laugh not to cry. But even this sorrowful laughter will disappear when he begins to encounter more unpleasant things, such as insults, insults, unfounded accusations, threats and harassment. But things can get even more complicated for this President, who has turned into a punching bag, when legal violations begin to appear, such as the sale of apartments without the approval of the Association (and therefore without proof of any possible obligations or debts), the change purpose (for example: companies, Airbnb), modifications without permission and even rooms in attics without ownership documents. I’ve heard of presidents (even administrators and executive committee members) who were struggling, depressed, medicated to deal with the stress and insomnia caused by problems on the block.

It seems to me that it is not our behavior that is the fundamental problem, but what is hidden behind it, namely our character—fierce individualism and self-centeredness, flight from duty and horror of involvement. We want rights, but not duties; we want to be well, but we don’t care what is left or right; we complain a lot but do little; we criticize, but we cannot bear to be criticized. There is no question of civic consciousness, we will not lift a finger if we have nothing to earn. We Romanians are not social animals. We remain wildly individualistic, except in moments of anarchy (water running into our heads, a block collapsing, our goat dying) or rare glimpses of humanity and mercy. Out of over 20 apartments in the block where I live, only three people offer help when needed, and the rest are asking or waiting for something.

Owners constantly avoid the role of chairman. The reasons are always the same: lack of time, demanding work, family, health problems, etc. In other words, human nature and life in general are invoked as justifications. I wonder what these people think about those who take on this role: that we are androids without personal and professional lives? That we haven’t found other interesting activities besides becoming punching bags for the neighbors? That for us life means something completely different, flows in a completely different way and does not have the same meaning?

I worked for six years in Romanian diplomacy, where I encountered the same avoidance of responsibility and the same pathological fear of responsibility. The country’s commitments and effective projects are only the result of pats on the shoulder and retaliatory blows of our strategic partners. Some call this shirking of responsibility a national sport, but I’d lean more toward a “domestic pathology,” given how viciously it’s passed down from generation to generation. It is certain that it has become part of the Romanian spirit, which determines our way of acting, thinking, attitude towards the world and ourselves.

What are the reasons why we Romanians ended up like this? What factors shaped and transformed the Romanian character and spirit? I think that here Prof. university Daniel David can provide much deeper and more informed answers through his excellent book The Psychology of the Romanian People than I can. Genetics, social and cultural heritage, historical baggage, etc. come into play – too many variables for me to speculate.

But from what I have observed so far, I can safely say that changes in this Romanian spirit (“progress” would be too optimistic) cannot intervene as long as our own way of thinking is against us. I mean the disorder in our minds, the incoherence of ideas and the lack of logic. We do not know how to debate using arguments, only logical fallacies, showing a special tendency to attack a person and appeal to authority. Chaos in our minds affects all the systems we have built, from social and educational to governmental and legislative. However, we can no longer blame genetic and cultural inheritance. Right thinking is learned, and that’s where education (or lack thereof) comes in. The great project “Educated Romania” deprived us of the last hope, banishing forever the disciplines that deal with the structure of thought – logic and philosophy.

If you think that we are left, I will answer you simply: God. Jobs, projects, commitments related to our will, experience and duty, begin and end with the words “God help” or “God’s will” or “God’s will”. I explained to the handyman who said “God help me” after finishing the roof repair that it was better to have him help me than a deity, but his look told me that non-believers didn’t even deserve the warranty provided by the contract. God was brought into the equation for quite simple reasons: we refuse to take responsibility for our actions, we deny responsibility, we assign blame, we prefer to leave room for so-called luck and bad luck, we reject the opportunity to help ourselves, and perhaps , we realize to some extent that the situation is hopeless. –

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